Let’s assume that you’re a computer gamer and you’re playing against somebody in a vicious game of death match. You just leaped out of a shadow, jumped down behind him, ducked an incoming rocket, and owned your opponent. To celebrate your victory at a Mad Dog’s you’d:
- savor the expression of anguish on your opponents face
- leap up and scream, “Suck it up, monkeyboy!”
- high-five your teammates
- sing a rousing chorus of, “Who’s yo daddy?”
- announce that he couldn’t get you if you were on life support
- begin the smack talk for the inevitable rematch
Now let’s assume you were at home alone playing on the Internet. You’d celebrate your amazing victory in the following ways:
- checking your email
- text messaging a friend
- tearing your rotator cuff patting yourself on the back
It’s like the difference between going to a hockey game or watching one on TV. Sure, you can see it all happen on the screen — but there’s nothing like being there in person.
LAN the Ultimate Defense Against LAG
Another advantage of playing games at Mad Dog’s is the LAN itself, which stands for “Local Area Network.” As opposed to the Internet, which stands for “really, really big area network slowed down by people actually trying to do productive things.”
When you play games on a LAN, you’re only a few feet away from the server. When you and your friends shoot a really big gun, it fires instantly, preferably while it’s still pointed at your stunned opponent. It’s intense! Whereas when you play games over the Internet, you will often have time to catch a rerun of Seinfeld between the time when you fire your weapon and the time it eventually makes its way to the intended target, who by this time has had kids and moved to Jersey.
Anyone who can compare the two will agree that playing over the Net can never compete with the adrenaline of playing on a local network while physically being with your friends!